The Dude Abides

Hello, welcome back, it is time for me to post again.  No reason in particular, I just felt compelled to write down some thoughts.  The title, you ask?  Awesome song by The Who called Behind Blue Eyes.  Limp Bizkit does the song no fucking justice, and I wish they would all die.  Anyways, the title kind of expresses how I feel currently.  Now, moving onward, because I feel like writing more.

Today is Independence Day.  Well, that is, if you’re from Caucasian ancestry.  Perhaps they should shoot fireworks on the day the Emancipation Proclamation was signed, or maybe on the day the Civil Rights Act took effect.  Nah, this is just easier.  But, looking at the whole idea of the Fourth, I have to say it’s bullshit.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my country and all that nonsense, but the logic in the whole holiday doesn’t add up.  What exactly are we celebrating?  The fact that we’re free?  I’m sorry, but I have to beg to differ on that principle.  Now, to give you my reasoning on why we’re not, I’d like to present me.

Hello, how are we today?  Good, glad to hear that.  But not really, I could give a fuck less.  Today’s topic of discussion is freedom, and why we don’t have it as a country.  It’s really simple.  Independence has never existed in our country, and I don’t care what Declaration you throw at me.  Nope, never has.  We’re not independent, and I’d have to call you a dumbass to think otherwise.  Look at it like this.  We were started as a colony, got fucked over, and then fought a war to gain our liberty from that country.  Afterwards, we then found ourselves in an enormous amount of debt to the French, debt that we never have fully paid back, and debt that we never will pay back.  Free?  Hardly.  We never even got past colony.

Sure, I’ll give you that we govern ourselves, or rather let rich assholes do it for us.  We act as an independent nation because no other country will call us on our bullshit.  Look at China.  They could own damn near every business in the United States with a couple of quick phone calls.  We owe them so much dough it is insane.  And we continue to spend, mindlessly.  Free?  Nah, it’s more like an ever increasing bar tab.  One day, our credit will run out, and then we’ll be truly fucked.

On that day, the people that have spending our non-existent money will finally realize what assholes they truly are, and the people that elected them will too.  And they’ll all feel like fucking retards, rightfully.  People will begin spending on only the necessities.  Things like television and new cell phones won’t become so important.  People would learn to share and live off of each other, because working separately they’re screwed.  Conversation will return in light of nobody being able to afford much else.  I, from my miniature soap box, will half-heartedly write a post telling everybody that reads this that I predicted it, as many already have.  And you will read, you will realize that I am correct, and you will realize that I am awesome.  The day some country wants their money is the day I take my first step towards ruling the whole world.  Moo hoo hah hah!  If only our country would go bankrupt, the world would be a better place.  In closing, Happy Fourth, and enjoy shooting off your imported fireworks.  I know I will.  Ahh, the glorious irony.

It’s a fun thought, perhaps, but I couldn’t rule the world.  Maybe in stints here and there.  But, I ramble.  On to my ranting, because nothing else really has come to light.

I was browsing through the wide world of Web the other day, and I happened upon an article.  Now, I’ve seen plenty of these before, but this time it really just steamed me.  It was one of those “How to…(insert something dealing with relationships here)” articles.  That is nothing but heaping load of crap.  I can’t imagine the people that buy into that garbage.  Books teaching you how to act in a relationship?  Really?  Come on people, I thought you were smarter than this.  I must have given you way too much credit, somehow.  If you have to go to a book or an online article to figure out what the hell is wrong with you and your significant other, then they obviously are not that significant.  It works the other way, too.  If everything is fine, don’t buy in to that crap that tells you there may be something wrong.  There isn’t.  You love each other, keep it that way.  Don’t go fucking around changing things because your relationship doesn’t add up to the dumbass article test scores.

Here’s my quick tip.  Be yourself.  If you can’t handle them being theirselves, and/or vice versa, split.  It’s real fucking simple.  Talk to each other.  Find out what makes them tick.  Dating is finding out about people, not trying to impress somebody.  It pisses me off when couples turn to books and shit to figure out how their relationship should be run.  It should be run by both of you, not some bullshit author who has no idea what you are like or how either of you function.  It takes time to build a strong relationship, not five minutes reading an online ‘how to’ book.  That’s the problem with people today.  They don’t want to put any time or effort into anything.  Lazy fucks, myself included.  People want things done now, like yesterday now, and they want somebody else to do it.  What they don’t understand is that when you actually put your whole heart and your whole being into something, the rewards are so much greater.  You don’t need those fucking articles, all you need is your own damn self and some work ethic.  So, to all of the idiot authors, shut the fuck up.  Your large numbers of bullshit writing is only outmassed by the couples you helped break up with that awful excuse for literature.  I enjoy finding the printable version to use as toilet paper.  Ha.  You’re welcome.

All that being said, I have come to another realization.  I really do need to move on from this whole shenanigan that was my previous relationship.  I constantly think about her, and this frustrates me.  I’m over the whole idea of depression and getting her back.  It’s futile, that’s cool.  My thinking, as irrational as it may sound, is that to get her out of my head, perhaps I need somebody else there.  Hmmm?  Pretty fucking clever, isn’t it?  So, I am now seriously looking for a new not as significant other.  Any comments, or suggestions, please feel free to leave a comment.  Now, that has been said, and I shall move on to the closing.

That does it for me America.  Until next time.  Take it easy.

The Dude

P.S.  I still love you.